Well, I have now revised the first two chapters (out of 24) of the first book in the CHAOS TRILOGY, CHAOS WITHIN. So, although I’ve posted a little bit of this before, I thought I’d share the first few pages. Hope you like it.
A little background on the story:
The balance between good and evil has shifted and the fate of the world rests in the hands of an awkward seventeen-year old girl. Too bad she has no idea.
Julie Thomas is no “normal” teenager. Her hallucinations and crazy nightmares have taught her that much. But when her new boyfriend and the hot guy from her dreams convince her that the visions mean something else, Julie must figure out who she really is before she is consumed by her fear – or worse, her parents have her committed.
Now, on to the revised, rewritten beginning:
Most people forget their dreams. Not me. I remember all of them. Every little detail. Especially the terrifying ones – where I fall. Backwards. Into nothing.
It always starts the same, a pleasant memory or thought that gives way to terror. And a tugging that begins at the back of my abdomen, like someone has tied a string to my belly button and is pulling it back through my spine. Then I spin out of control, away from the fading scene.
Into something worse. Much worse.
I really hate that part.
Last night’s dream was no different. The pleasant memory – my tenth birthday – was happy enough. Too bad the dream didn’t end there.
It was a cool October day, the backyard decorated in a mass of pink. I looked around, my six brothers and sisters surrounding Mom as she brought the cake outside. It was beautiful – white frosting with pink and green flowers. Eleven candles flickered around the edges. “Happy Birthday Julie” glistened in pink gel icing in the middle. Perfect.
“Hurry up, Julie. Blow out the dang candles before they melt, would ya.” My older sister Janice rolled her blue eyes at me, tossing her perfect blond hair. At sixteen, she thought she could avoid these little family events, especially if she had a date. She was wrong.
And I was going to pay for it.
“Yeah, come on all ready.” Jeff was the oldest and could have been Janice’s twin. He hated family events almost as much as she did. In fact, no one really wanted to be at my birthday party.
Well, almost no one.
“Don’t listen to them, Julie. Now, make a wish and blow.” Matt smiled, his eyes dancing with encouragement. He always made me feel important – like I was destined for greatness somehow.
I stared at my brother, drawing from his strength. I needed to blow them all out this time. Needed to get this one thing right.
But I couldn’t. Everything went black.
And I fell. Backwards.
The scene blurred as darkness engulfed the space. I pushed against it, willing myself out of the paralyzing black space. But it was no use. It wouldn’t budge.
The emptiness continued to bear down and choke the air from the room. My lungs strained to pull oxygen into my body as I started to suffocate.
“Help me!” The scream escaped my lips before I could stop it and tears stung my face, the last of my air supply gone.
“Sshh. It’s okay.” Two arms grabbed my shoulders, pulling me from the black abyss. “Wake up now, Julie. You’re just dreaming.”
I opened my eyes, straining to see in the dark. Matt sat on my bed, smiling as he eased me awake. But, he had changed. He wasn’t eleven anymore. Not even close.
I reached for him, his image fading through my fingertips. The site of my arms startled me. I wasn’t a child either.
I continued to stare at my arms, confusion permeating my thoughts. I watched in horror as the molecules moved and separated, revealing a new scene in the distance.
A blood-curdling scream tore through my throat and I squeezed my eyes shut, begging to release from the dream.
And again I fell backwards. Into another nightmare.
A forest and a path. Unfamiliar.
This was a new dream.
I walked forward, tentative. Nothing seemed wrong.
But I felt…scared. So very scared.
The scene changed, the forest morphing into a landscape of cliffs and plateaus. I glanced around, my pulse increasing with each passing second. I tried to force myself awake, end the fear mounting in my chest.
And still the scene continued to unfold around me, engulfing me. The plateau I stood on began to shrink, forcing me towards the edge of the cliff. My breathing came in quick shallow gasps with each step. The cliff’s rim crept closer and my heart hammered against my chest. There was no escape. I would have to jump.
I stood at the edge of my own terror, staring into the abyss. A light breeze caressed my neck. Paralyzed, I froze in place, no sound save the pounding of my heart. The wind touched my skin. And it felt like…someone.
I turned, expecting to see a person behind me. But there was no one. Only the soft wind buffeting against my face.
Until I heard it – a voice calling to me, the words lost in the breeze itself. I strained to hear, focusing only on the melodic inflections of the voice. Low, husky, mesmerizing. Each tone soaked into my skin, pulling me towards the sound.
“I am coming for you. Wait-”
The sound died in the air as chills exploded down my spine.
That’s it for now…hope you enjoyed it!