You guys know I love Christina Katz’ newsletter, the Prosperous Writer. Well, today I received one that really made sense to me. Her focus for the week was detachment.
In the newsletter she stated that a lot of her continued success has been related to her practice of detachment – not indifference, the extreme version of detachment – but the art of not attaching to the noise that life throws at us.
Man-oh-man….
She’s been living my life I think.
Since April I have been trying to focus on detachment – riding in the middle. I’ve blogged about it before, but it bears repeating…
I have had this crazy rollercoaster ride in my personal and private lives. I’ve had news that my mom had very serious cancer, and news that my own medical issues are gone. I’ve received rejection after rejection on some very dear projects, and sold others. All within a matter of hours or days.
It’s enough to make anyone a little nuts.
Unless you’ve become good at riding the middle – refusing to attach to the highs or the lows.
I haven’t always been good at this, as my online BFFs will tell you. Some days I wonder from the middle and get smacked down pretty hard by an oncoming wave of whatever.
But I have gotten better about picking myself up, dusting myself off and moving forward.
All because I am learning to ride the middle rails. Learning to show myself enough compassion to give myself a break and stop taking everything so personally!
There is real freedom in this – in finding a center flow and going with it. It is enabling me to flux between two projects, without feeling like I’ve somehow failed. And it’s enabled me to give up some other things that I has horribly, unhealthily attached to.
So, here’s my two-cent advice on this one for the day – as life throws the good and bad at you, as it always will because that is just life, do your best not to personalize or attach to it. Try to stay in the middle. See it for what it really is – just another beautiful aspect of life. Neither good nor bad…just life.
I promise, it will help when things get….intense!
What are your thoughts on this?
Intense Life Coaching 
So true, Christine !
But sometimes so difficult…
I really like this. I’ve been trying to just accept what is, though I hadn’t thought it out this clearly. It’s hard to not want to build up the highs, but then the lows are so much more potent, too. Thanks for the tip. -Kelly
Excellent advice! Easier to give, than follow.;) I have often been admonished for wearing my heart on my sleeve. But as I’ve grown older, I’ve come to the realization that life is too short to give into negative ’emotional intensity’. It’s a work in progress, but I’m really trying to ‘not sweat the small things’ and appreciate all that I do have.
Oh hon, this is truly something I needed to hear right now. I do tend to get thrown about the boat as the waves hit, one after another. I got some unexpected news yesterday and have been reeling all day. I need to remember that “riding the middle” doesn’t mean I don’t care; it just means I care deeply but I won’t allow it to throw me off course. It just needs to come along for the ride.
Hm…sticky note on the monitor or a more permanent reverse tattoo on my forehead? 😉
This is a very Daoist philosophy and one I’ve tried to capture in Tai chi often. I never even come close. :o) But that doesn’t mean I won’t stop trying in life and Tai chi practice!
Thanks for sharing, Christine!
This is a great idea – and so simple in theory – but in practice, man oh man. Break out the paper bags, I need to practice breathing again. 🙂
Hi Christine,
I think you hit the nail on the head. Balance is the key, otherwise you can get sucked in and under. Off-balance? Too involved? Take a walk. Look around and appreciate what surrounds you. That alone can put things back in perspective.